Today, a really attractive guy was working out in front of me on the treadmills at the gym. I used him as motivation to run faster, visualizing that I could reach him if I ran fast enough. He kept turning around to look at me. At first I was flattered but then I realized it was because I had been muttering “my precious” creepily under my breath. MLIA.
Last night I stayed over at a friend’s house. When I woke up to go to the bathroom, I was thoroughly confused when she told me not get lost. As it turns out, during the night I had slept walked to the bathroom but then went downstairs into her parent’s room and pulled off their comforter, telling them it was on fire and I was saving them. Her dad peed himself. Her mom said she’d never laughed harder. MLIA
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Today, I wanted to see if my teacher actually reads our essays, or just grades them based on neatness. The assignment was to write about the importance of money in our lives. I wrote a detailed essay on baluga whales and how they resembled aquatic snowmen. I got an A. MLIA
Last night, while sleeping, I felt my hand land on someone else’s. I freaked out, thrashing about in my bed, until I realized that my right hand had fallen asleep, and that I was holding hands with myself. MLIA
Today, I was fixing my dad’s iTunes because he doesn’t really know how to use it. I found a song that he titled “more roars”. Curious, I clicked on it, and I realized it was a recording of him roaring like a dinosaur. MLIA
My grandpa and I were talking about pets we’ve had. He told me he once had a cat who was born without a penis. I asked, “Oh god, how did that turn out?!” He looked at me blankly and said, “…She’s fine.” MLIA
Today, I was looking though my school progress reports from when I was younger. Apparently, I got in trouble for covering my ears then yelling in Quiet Reading Time, thinking no one could hear me. Seemed like a plausible theory at the time. MLIA
You Make Me Smile. :)
You’re better then the best
I’m lucky just to linger in your light
Cooler then the flip side of my pillow, that’s right
Completely unaware
Nothing can compare to where you send me,
Lets me know that it’s ok, yeah it’s ok
And the moments where my good times start to fade
You make me smile like the sun
Fall out of bed, sing like bird
Dizzy in my head, spin like a record
Crazy on a Sunday night
You make me dance like a fool
Forget how to breathe
Shine like gold, buzz like a bee
Just the thought of you can drive me wild
Ohh, you make me smile
Even when you’re gone
Somehow you come along
Just like a flower poking through the sidewalk crack and just like that
You steal away the rain and just like that
You make me smile like the sun
Fall out of bed, sing like bird
Dizzy in my head, spin like a record
Crazy on a Sunday night
You make me dance like a fool
Forget how to breathe
Shine like gold, buzz like a bee
Just the thought of you can drive me wild
Ohh, you make me smile
Don’t know how I lived without you
Cause every time that I get around you
I see the best of me inside your eyes
You make me smile
You make me dance like a fool
Forget how to breathe
Shine like gold, buzz like a bee
Just the thought of you can drive me wild
You make me smile like the sun
Fall out of bed, sing like bird
Dizzy in my head, spin like a record
Crazy on a Sunday night
You make me dance like a fool
Forget how to breathe
Shine like gold, buzz like a bee
Just the thought of you can drive me wild
Ohh, you make me smile
:) ;) :] ;] you make ME smile!
Today, my friend ask me if Mormons celebrate Christmas, because I am Mormon. I told her that we don’t, but we celebrate Nomrom (Mormon backwards), just as a joke. She believed me, even when I told her about the ceremonial green jello. She will be coming to celebrate with me on December 27th. I am so excited. MLIA
I grew up in a college town, and one Halloween our doorbell rang and we opened the door expecting to see trickortreater—but what was in front of our open door—was another door! Like, a full-on wooden door, that had a sign that said “Please knock.” So we did, and the door swung open to reveal a bunch of college dudes dressed as really old grandmothers, curlers in their hair, etc, who proceeded to coo over our “costumes” and tell us we were “such cute trick or treaters!” One even pinched my cheek. Then THEY gave US candy, closed their door, picked it up and walked to the next house. MLIA
Today, I was having a small birthday bash with a few friends. I got a call from a telemarketer that I answer. My friends proceeded to get pins and some balloons we had still lying around, while another guy went to the front door and began banging on it. I opened it, and there we all started shouting and popping balloons like gunshots. I dropped the phone, and my friend picked it up saying “YOU HEARD NOTHING” in his creepy voice and hung up. Birthday well spent. MLIA
